I'm Tired

What happens when people get tired of fighting for something better; of fighting for principles, for rights, for chivalry? What happens when a society languishes and lets people take advantage of its apathy by feeding off its loopholes? Because that's what I'm dangerously close to.

I know what I sound like: a diva, one of those people who complain about everyone and expect people to jump when I complain. I'm fine with people thinking of me that way, because to me, I'm trying to create a world that I want to live in and be in.

Is it right for telcos to provide sub-par service? No. Is it right for office buildings to provide insufficient parking lots and close it all day to non-season parkers? No. Is it right for our Ministry of Tourism and whoever is in charge of our environment to sit quietly while our coral gardens are being irrepairably damaged? No.

But goddammit, I'm tired of being one of the few who are willing to do anything. Everyone else sits there and complains but is too lazy or can't be bothered to do anything. I want to make my little corner of the world a little bit better, but it's not easy doing it alone.

It's even worse when there's resistance and people look at you like you're crazy because you're asking for a safer parking location, or for pamphlets educating visitors and locals on how to care for corals, or for a telco that won't have dropped calls for every 2 out of 3 calls made. It's the worst when people won't even try to help you. They won't even try.

I'm tired. That's the gist of it. I'm tired. I want to be a better person in a better place, but I'm too goddamn tired.

The Myth of the High Standard

It being Valentine's Day, I think it's only natural for the mind to turn to coupling. And, of course, the eternal question, "Where's your boyfriend?". The assumption by most is that I have high standards. Do I really? Honestly, I don't think so. I may talk the talk, but I don't really expect my boyfriends to spend lavishly on me or to take me jetsetting. I don't really expect very much. Yet, here I sit, boyfriend-less. Do I really have high standards?

The Standards:

1. My boyfriend won't lie to me (at least when it counts), because I wouldn't lie to him.
2. The girlfriend isn't outranked by anyone except family. Don't forget, we're talking about a long-term relationship here.
3. My boyfriend will remember my birthday. It's not that hard.
4. When I'm angry or upset, my boyfriend will hold me and tell me that he loves me. Same goes with when I'm insecure, hormonal, depressed, etc. It's a failsafe that works for all occasions. You know why? Because not one ex-boyfriend has ever done this for me.
5. My boyfriend wants me around.

When I tried to list that down, it was pretty hard to come up with 5, but there it is and I think the list is complete. I can't speak for other women, but I personally don't need anything more than these 5 things from my partner.

I don't think the standards are very high. They're not high expectations for anyone other than a child or a family pet, but still the only person I've ever met who hit all 5 wasn't even a boyfriend. Maybe that was my mistake.

What kind of people live in this world?

This postcard was posted on Postsecret on 16 January 2011. I don't usually diss people's secrets because who am I to judge? But this really got to me. I've always wondered what kind of people would intentionally seduce someone else's partner and feel no remorse. What kind of men or women would put someone else's significant other through the pain and heartbreak of having their partners cheat on them?

And that's just the tip of the iceberg. It's even worse when it's a community secret - where everyone else knows except the family, and the rest of the world just looks at them pityingly and knowingly. This is such a common occurrence in Malaysia it's ridiculous.

But the fact that this person would think it's "weird" that her alleged good friend confided in her on something that would have taken a lot to discuss with someone else. That just disgusts me.

I've been in a position where some bitch completely disregarded the fact that my boyfriend was going out with me and continued to try to pursue him. Nevermind the fact that he said no. What kind of people live in this world? Women (and men alike) who do these things need to be made to feel the pain that they've inflicted on others, and to permanently wear a sign on their forehead telling the world the kind of people they are.

Why is the Illegal Status of Child Marriages a Secret?

A few weeks ago, a school teacher married a 14-year old girl (Source: The Star). Of course, the government and a female minister (heaven forbid it be a male minister) retaliated. More shockingly, earlier in the year, a man took an 11-year-old as his fourth wife (Source: The Star). The government promised to look into it (Source: The Star). And quite surprisingly, they actually did!

You know what the verdict was? It is this:

The marriage of an 11-year-old Muslim girl to a 41-year-old man has been ruled illegal in Malaysia. An Islamic court judge found the father of the child had had no intention of marrying her off, and that there were elements of threat and force involved.
(Source: BBC News)

You must be wondering what my damage is. Why am I getting uptight about this? Here's the thing.

The response from the Malaysian people was deplorable. The response from the government was from "the government". Nobody took ownership. The only one who did was a woman minister. Some have even come forward to support the marriage of the 14-year-old, and of course, it was a man (Source: The Malay Mail).

Malaysian men seem to not understand that girls at the age of 14 are just that: they're girls. When I was 14, I was young and impressionable, though I would never have admitted it. At that age, I wanted to impress people with how adult and mature I was, and I would have done plenty of things that I wouldn't do now to impress people. At the age of 14, you don't know when you're making a mistake.

When I was 14, I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life. I'm 26 now, and I'm still trying to figure it out. I know people in their mid-30s who still don't know it yet. You think a 14-year-old knows what she wants?

By no means am I belittling her intelligence. She could be very smart and actually ready for this, but she sets a dangerous precedent for other girls her age who are easily talked into things like this. If her parents are not on their guard, if her dad reacts the way Muzli Mohd Din did, who will save her? The Shari'ah court? Hah!

Of course, everybody remembers the case of Bung Mokhtar and Zizie. How they married illegally, and all they had to do was pay RM1,000 (Source: The Star). That was all. A slap on the wrist for putting Bung Mokhtar's family through the shame of finding out that their dad is an ass through the public media.

Men in Malaysia will never stand up for the rights of women in marriage. Our good Minister of Women, Family and Community Development, while she tries, will never overstep her bounds as a Minister of UMNO first and foremost, and the protector of women's rights second.

The result is that men can marry illegally with impunity. Nevermind that by Syari'ah law, they need the permission of their first wives. My damage is that. Exactly that. That men can marry illegally, and when they're brought to the public, the public says, "well, it's his right". It's not his right. It's his privilege. It's a privilege that must be earned, by being wise and caring and fair.

What about his family? What about his kids? If you think you have the balls to have 2 women, then why don't you have the balls to tell your family and kids about it? Why don't they have enough respect for their family to tell them face-to-face instead of having the rest of the world talking about it behind their backs? Why let them find out from the media or from other people? Why hide it? Hiding it means they know it's wrong.

So, of course, the decision of the Syari'ah court wasn't published in Malaysian newspapers. I had to find out about it through BBC News, because Malaysians wouldn't really care about that. Would they?

Customer Service Review: The Maybank Malfunction

What Happened: On Monday (25th October 2010), Maybank experienced a nationwide system failure. All ATMs and Maybank2U ceased to function, and Maybank2e payroll functions were affected. Some got paid 2 months' salary (only for the extra 1 month to be taken away again, sadly), and some didn't get paid.

The Situation:

• Mistake #1 - I went to the ATM to withdraw money, which I needed seeing as how I only had RM10 in my wallet. The ATMs were not working. I asked the concierge what other options I had to withdraw money. She sent me back to the ATMs to try again.
• Mistake #2 - After I had tried 3 more times at the ATMs, I called the call centre and found out that I can withdraw money over-the-counter (which the concierge failed to mention to me), I waited in a growing line of people. Only 2 out of 6 counters were open. 1 person was served in 15 minutes.
• Mistake #3 - After scanning headlines on Tuesday, I found no mention of the Maybank nationwide system failure. As if it were some kind of dirty secret and ignoring it will make it seem like it never happened.

The Result: I have no idea what happened on Monday. I don't know whose fault it was and what steps Maybank is going to take to stop it from happening again. I no longer have confidence in Maybank to safeguard my money and will have to place my money elsewhere. I can only imagine that other people feel the same way. I mean, we're trusting this system that failed epically to safeguard our money.

The Aftermath:

Number of complaints made - 3.

Follow ups - 2.

Maybank has promised to get their IT people to call me and explain. I think they've missed the point that I tried to make repeatedly, which was that they need to inform their customers or they're going to lose them. Nevertheless, I will be one of a small % of people who will have an explanation about what happened to their system, which I will post here in case people go online to look for it.

Power to the People

Warning: This is a general blog post with no real point and so rambles on for a while. Don't complain if you decide to read it and go, "what the fuck was that?" at the end. 

Has anyone noticed how smoking on TV has become persona non grata? Seriously, try to find a contemporary TV show with someone smoking and it's either a classic bad guy character or it's a main character with a guilty vice trying to hide it from his friends.

It just goes to show how powerful the media can be. They decided that smoking is bad for people. They decided to champion the cause. And look at what's happened. It's like the whole, what I like to call, 'Plastic Bag Incident'. Someone somewhere one day decided to go to war against plastic bags, and now everyone has to pay 10 cents for a bag.

Don't get me wrong - I'm all for these movements that help the world (I hope) and try to uphold values for impressionable young children. It's just scary how powerful the media can be when they're harping on an issue. They should support more causes like that.

Which brings me to my next issue - what the hell is up with these 'Community Service Ads' on the radio these days? It's ridiculous. They're out there saying things like, "Don't put your handbags in plain sight - it will get stolen" or "Don't put cushions in your car - thieves will target women's cars". Am I the only one who thinks this is retarded?

Why are women being blamed for having their handbags stolen? Why don't the ads say, "Don't steal. Stealing is wrong. Get a job."? What is wrong with these people? Yes, that's right, 104.9 Red FM. I'm talking about you. Get your head on straight.

Customer Service Review: GMG Airlines

Business: Budget airline
Location: Bangladesh
Website: Don't really care

The Situation:

2 weeks before Chinese New Year, my family decides to go to Bangkok for a quick holiday. Of course, because it's already so near to the holiday and it's peak season, flights were expensive. However, my dad excitedly told us one day that he'd found a cheap option: GMG Airlines, which offered return flights on our chosen days at just about RM800 per person all in.

To start with, we're not that fussy. I've been flying Air Asia since it started and had just a small fleet of propellor planes. We're no strangers to budget airlines, and I'm grateful for their existence since they mean I can fly to a whole lot of places for cheap. So we were equally happy that we'd got a good deal on flights.

KL to Bangkok

Our flight was supposed to be at 8am, meaning checking in at 6am, meaning leaving at 5am to get to the airport on time. You can imagine how unimpressed we were when we got there bleary-eyed and sleepless and discovered that the flight was delayed from 8am to 3pm. So we went home, got some more sleep and came back for the flight.

This time, there were no issues and the food was actually pretty good.

Bangkok to KL

So our flight back was supposed to be at 8.40pm. If all went according to plan, we figured I could get home by 12am and get a good night's rest for my first day on the new job the next day.

• 8.00pm - No gate had yet been assigned to the flight. Boarding was supposed to be at 8.10pm.
• 8.15pm - Notice comes up: Delayed until 9.30pm
• 9.30pm - No gate assigned to the flight yet. Dad calls GMG's airport manager in Malaysia (we got his number so that we could call ahead and make sure the flight was on schedule to leave).
• 9.45pm - Notice comes up: Delayed to 11pm. Airport staff have no idea what's going on. GMG's Thai airport manager calls my dad to explain that he has no idea what's going on. The plane left Dhaka for Bangkok but turns back. He's frustrated - wants to quit.
• 11.30pm - Against all odds, the plane actually leaves.

So what happened was - by the time I got home and got into bed, it was 5am. I had to go into my first day of work on 1 hour of sleep. Thanks a lot, GMG!

The verdict:

It doesn't matter how cheap a GMG flight is - they're not worth the money!

I Wish I Were More Selfish

It's a weird wish, but I wish I were more selfish. I'm not saying that I'm the world's most compassionate person, but the pressure that the world puts on people in general these days to care is incredible.

I can't walk around without feeling guilty about something or other, and it doesn't matter how much charity work I do, I'll always feel bad for not donating money to someone who I know prefers not to get a job because he makes more money begging.

I think it just got to a point where I felt enough was enough when I flicked a red ant, watched it die and then felt incredibly sorry because it had to go through the pain and suffering that I inflicted on it.

Really, I think there should be a switch when I should be able to switch it off.

Perez Who?

So I've never liked Perez Hilton. I mean, I'm sure he's a nice person in real life and all that, but to be safer, let's say that I've never liked his public persona.

For starters, his real name is Mario Armando Lavandeira. To go with a name like Perez Hilton is a bit like, wtf? I shall call him Mario Armando. Because that's his name. Secondly, have you ever seen what he looks like? He's a fat and ugly mofo. There's no law against being a fat and ugly mofo, but there should be if you're making a living off making fun off celebrities. I don't have anything against gossip bloggers. I, myself, depend on The Superficial for my daily light reading at work, but I feel that once people start calling themselves 'celebrities' and joining reality shows with other pseudo-celebrities, that's where I draw the line. I've said all this before, and I'll definitely say it again if someone asks me.

The source of this rant is of course the ubiquitous news story about how Mario Armando was 'attacked' by Will.I.Am and his honchos. Apparently, the sequence of events went like this:

1. Will.I.Am sounded off on Mario Armando.
2. Mario Armando gets annoyed and says 'Why should I respect you? I don't respect you ... you're a fucking faggot'.
3. Skirmish.
4. Someone knocks out Mario Armando in the melee.

So, Mario Armando gets angry because he's a reporter (let's go out on a limb and call him a 'journalist') and the subject of his reporting becomes angry at, let's say 'alleged falsehoods claimed against him'. I may not actually be a journalist so I wouldn't really know, but isn't that (gee, I don't know) part and parcel of being a journalist? And then Mario Armando the genius also instead of saying "Hey, man, don't hate the playa, hate the game", goes on to say "you're a fucking faggot".

This is, to me, akin to someone bumping into me at clubs several times and then knocking over my drink. Ehem. They deserve it.

Oh, the fun continues. Mario Armando proceeds to tweet about it calling on his Twitter followers to call the police and ask them to go to his location. Yes, because the police have nothing better to do than answer hundreds of calls asking them to go save the life of a man who was punched in the face. Nope, no car accidents or emergency situations. None.

I felt a bit callous when I tweeted that it was stupid for someone to tweet about how badly they've been hurt and how they need the police rather than call the police and ambulance (since oh my god he's so badly hurt) themselves. And then, thanks to the lovely The Superficial and John Mayer, I felt validated.

Let's make this clear. This isn't a tirade against Mario Armando. I don't hate Mario Armando as a person, but I hate how he makes himself out to be a celebrity and acts in the dim limelight that casts upon him every so often.

Beware, call centre staff

Today is the day that I catch up on all my 'calling up and sorting out' errands. Not to say that I don't have any work. Actually, I have quite a lot of work. I'm just procrastinating. Anyway, my point is, you'll probably see more than one entry like this today.

Call to Citibank

I lost my credit card sometime 2 weeks ago so I cancelled it and they issued a new one, which obviously has a new credit card number. I haven't got around to checking my mailbox quite yet, so I haven't received it or activated it. I did try to pay my credit card bill last week, however, by calling up the call centre, asking for the new number and Maybank2u-ing to them. Following is the conversation that occurred after I got an SMS from M2U telling me that my payment was rejected:

Me: Hi, can I find out why my payment got rejected?

Him: I'm not sure, ma'am, it might be because the card isn't activated yet.

Me: Well that's ridiculous, I called last week and the lady said it was fine if I made the payment. Who's going to pay me back my Interbank Giro fee of RM2?

Him: Oh, your card doesn't need to be activated to make payment. I'll activate your card for you now.

Me: What? You just said I don't need my card to be activated to make the payment, but I need to activate my card now?

Him: Yes.

Me: ... I don't understand.

Him: You need to activate your card.

Me: Why?

Him: Have you received your card?

Me: No, I don't have it yet.

Him: Oh, then it's better if you don't activate your card if you don't have it yet.

Me: I know. I'm not calling you to activate my card [fuckwit]. I just want to know why my payment was rejected. Let's not talk about activating cards anymore. Now will you tell me why my payment was rejected?

Him: Maybe it's because the account number is wrong. You'll have to check with them if the account number is correct.

Me: Can I check with you?

Him: Okay.

Me: Please read me the account number.

Him: xxxx-xxxx-xxxx-xxxx

Me: Okay, the account number was wrong. That was all I needed to know. Thank you.

Yep. Beware, call centre wallas. Today's the day of reckoning.

I will/I won't

I felt the urge earlier to write a poem. That was a blast from the past. Haven't written anything in probably 4 years at least. Am I regressing? Am I wishing for a time long gone?

Probably, yes. I think I'm longing for a time when I was still bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, when I was still the 'ice queen', could keep myself protected in my little fortress of solitude and all was right with the world.

Now I find myself longing to tell people,

'No, I don't want to hang out with you because you will make me want things that I don't want, you will make me long for things that I don't want to long for, you will make me step outside my fortress and make me long for a life that will destroy me.

'I will schmooze when I need to, I will be the social butterfly when it is required of me, I will conform to that fit that people-shaped hole in your mind that you think I belong in when it is called for.

'I will be the cool aunt, the crazy cat lady, the girl with standards that were too high so she didn't get married, the woman who's too independent and couldn't find a man. I will do this for as long as it takes until I can carve my own little cave out of life and fill it with the love that I need. 

You have what you want of me. Let me be.

You know what I hate?

I absolutely hate (among other things, of course) being pigeon-holed within seconds of meeting someone new. I hate when the second I say, par example une, "I work in a bank" and BAM! they go "oh yeah, you won't be able to talk to my bosses because all you'll be able to talk about is accounting and business". It's annoying because there are so many adjectives that define me other than Banker that they don't bother to find out about, e.g. diver.

Also, the following (summarised) conversation took place:

I took 2 degrees, one in Economics and one in Sociology.

What does Sociology do? Is there a practical application?

No, not really, but it was great to learn about.

Why would you study it if there's no practical application?

For fun. I didn't want to go to uni and miss out on the chance to learn something new that I wouldn't get anywhere else.

Isn't that a waste of money?

I don't think education is a waste of money. There's no practical application, but it really helped me open my mind to other things.

What? That's bullshit. I don't believe that.

Is it just me, or does that conversation worry you about the future of mankind too?

Photoshopped goodness

Above is the new ad by Audrina Patridge for PETA. Firstly, she is not that hot. That's ridiculous. Secondly, just look at the extent to which she has been photoshopped. She has no knees! The only way she could have knees that smooth is if she were a Barbie doll. And we all know she's more skank than doll.

Keep It Out of the Gym

People should be banned from trying to pick up other people in the gym. I mean, the gym is meant to be a sanctuary, where people can feel comfortable going at any given day or time wearing whatever.

What's the point of going to a gym if you don't want to go on particular days because you don't feel comfortable around people? It's just totally selfish to try and pick up someone in a gym. Especially when they're politely trying to brush you off and they're just thick-headed.

There should be mandatory signs posted at all gyms saying, "No picking up". I swear, some people are so ridiculously inconsiderate.

Oh... right...

I've just found out that I weigh more than my mother, who isn't just menopausal and a grandmother, but is also the mother of not 1, not 2, but 4 kids.

And this, the week I find out that the Nero Restaurants have just opened up a restaurant (Nero Fico) literally across the street. Oh woe... what am I to do?

How not to make a website

So I've been assigned the task of organising my department's CNY dinner, which means for the past couple of days I've been scouring websites for possible locations and phone numbers. And of course, what's been happening is I've been coming across more websites that are totally and utterly useless in providing information than usual, no names mentioned (SOHO KL).

Here's a few tips about what people don't want to see when they go to a website:

1. If your text is almost the same color as your background and I can't read it, your website is crap.
2. If I can't find the scroll function to scroll down the list of outlets, your website is crap.
3. If I want to find your Store Directory and you call it "Outlet Preview", your website is crap.
4. If your website takes too long to load, your website is crap.
5. If my flash is v10.0.12 and you have popups appearing that say your website requires v9.0.115 or higher to function, your website is crap (Red FM).
6. If I click 'Contact Us' and it doesn't go anywhere, your website is crap (Fly FM)
7. If your business depends on your customers having your menu, and your website requires you signing up to download your .pdf menu, you fail at life (Room Service Deliveries).
8. If I click anywhere on the page outside the text and it redirects to the top of the page, your website is crap (The Superficial).

This list may or may not get longer over time. Most likely, it may.

Men

Men are the spawn of satan sent to make the lives of women throughout history a living hell of emotions. I contend that without men, women would have realised world peace, solved world hunger, and achieved a passion for fashion that has been previously unknown.

The urge to put on a scarf

I don't like Gray's Anatomy. I know this. It makes me emo. I know this. It makes me want to sit down and cry and look at the sky screaming, "Why, god? Why?" I know this. And yet, last night as I was ironing and the remote control was too far away, I watched it and got sucked in.

What I've learned from Gray's Anatomy:

1. Doctors will always get too emotionally involved.
2. All doctors are inordinately pretty.
3. Doctors will always cry and get depressed when patients take a turn for the worse.
4. Doctors will get depressed if the patients are having a hard time.

Excuse me, while I go put on skinny jeans, a mildly baggy t-shirt, and a scarf in 35ºC weather.

Dear Gayboy

Dear Gayboy,

I always knew that boys would break my heart. I just didn't think it would be you. Knowing that someone you care about doesn't care about you is bad enough when it comes from a person you thought were a real friend.

Allow me to inform you of what you lost. It was an unconditional friendship. 12 years of unconditional friendship. You threw that away because you were too lazy to pick up the phone and call me. That was the price of my friendship.

It's not a case of being able to wait until I get over whatever rampage I'm on. It's a case of you causing irretrievable pain and hurt that has been caused. And now, it's all over.

P.S.: You're so vain, I bet you think this entry is about you.

Inflasi Sifar My Butt

Remember the days when the government held an Inflasi Sifar (zero inflation) campaign? Man, those were the days... when the government cared about inflation.

I foresee a period of unprecedented inflation about to hit Malaysia. The impact on the economy? Who knows? But any idiot can see that an across the board increase in all essentials (petrol, staple foods, electricity and gas) will cause high levels of inflation. Especially when the increases are astronomical. 40%? Jesus. Then again, the government has never heard of small increases spread out over a few years to give the people time to internalise. Nope.

At least if they'd approved the minimum wage, more people would have more money to complain about the prices with. Logically it would result in a less jarring impact on the economy. People say that you can't implement a minimum wage, but I say that's wrong. It's possible, but there are many issues that have to be dealt with. I wanted to write a paper on it back when I was an undergraduate, but well, life got in a way.

In a nutshell, here's how to implement a minimum wage effectively:

1. Migration Reform: Step up border patrol so that illegal immigration is actually difficult. Implement constant checks on labour-intensive businesses to check for illegal immigrants. Tighten migration laws. This will take a few years to effectively implement.
2. Employment Laws: Gear employment laws towards citizens (not bumiputra).
3. Assess minimum wage levels. In Malaysia, it's probably best to have a much lower minimum wage for migrant-intensive businesses, e.g. maid services.
4. Rollout.

Take that, ineffective government.