Dear World

Dear Malaysian politicians,

Re: Malaysian politics

We would appreciate it if you stopped bickering amongst yourselves and got on with it. Also, we would appreciate it if you stopped putting citizens away for speaking their mind. If there weren't an element of truth in the words, you wouldn't be scared.

Sincerely,

A Malaysian citizen.

Dear Malays,

Re: Racial issues

Just because one race is standing up for their rights, it doesn't mean that they're taking away yours. It means that they want what's best for their people - to give their kids the best opportunities possible. Providing financial assistance based on race is not only unfair, it creates a maze of bureaucracy that prevents the truly needy to benefit from the financial aid programme.

Sincerely,

A Bumiputra.

Dear American politicians,

Re: Candidates for Presidency

Please stop electing your VPs based on looks and gossip-column attraction. It's very distracting.

Sincerely,

A citizen of the world.

Dear Malaysians,

Re: American politics

Please stop spending so much time analysing the American political arena. Our own politicians need to be whipped in shape first, and it doesn't matter which American is elected because you'll still get the chance to whine, bitch and complain about them.

Sincerely,

A Watcher.

Spermicide!

The word 'spermicide' always makes me think of a cartoon-like sperm saying, "I can't take it anymore. I just can't!" before ramming itself into a uterus wall. As sad as it sounds, dying sperms make some women happy, and apparently Deborah Anderson (not the musician) has found a cheap way to not only kill sperms, but also prevent AIDS - using Coca-Cola. From Reuters: Spermicide Coke, stale chips research wins Ig Nobels:

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - A researcher who figured out that Coke explodes sperm and scientists who discovered that people will happily eat stale chips if they crunch loudly enough won alternative "Ig Nobel" prizes Thursday.

Other winners included physicists who found out that anything that can tangle, will tangle and a team of biologists who ascertained that dog fleas jump farther than cat fleas.

Deborah Anderson of Boston University Medical Center and colleagues were awarded the chemistry prize for a 1985 study published in the New England Journal of Medicine that found Coca-Cola kills sperm.

She said she was serious in testing the soft drink because women were using it in a douche as a contraceptive and, later, to try to protect themselves from the AIDS virus.

"It definitely wouldn't work as a contraceptive because sperm swims so fast," Anderson said. But Coke made with sugar quickly kills sperm, she said, probably because sperm soak it up. "The sperm just kind of explode," she said in a telephone interview.

It kills the AIDS virus too, she said.

Really? Usually I'm inclined to believe people who work in universities who win awards, but a quick Google search has made me think twice. Snopes has concluded through its own research that Coke as a spermicide is ineffective. From Snopes: Coca-Cola Spermicide:

However, other researchers were unable to verify these results in later experiments. Subsequent trials performed by medical researchers in Taiwan (using several vari[e]ties of both Coca-Cola and Pepsi-Cola) led them to the opposite conclusion, that "cola has little if any spermicidal effect"[.]

So what's the deal? Isn't it a little irresponsible to say Coke works as a spermicide and prevents AIDS when it's inconclusive? I can see the headlines for the next 10 years: "Teen pregnancy caused by ineffective spermicide; Coca-Cola sued."

Apparently these Taiwanese researchers were trying to recreate an experiment conducted by Harvard researchers. Maybe Coke as a spermicide only works in America?

Multi-racial lions, oh my!

Them politicians need to take a page out of their book. From The Star: Multi-racial lion dance troupe turns heads:

IPOH: Lion dance troupes have long been a mainstay of the Chinese community, but the Muhibbah Lion Dance Group is taking a different route with its multi-cultural approach.

The group has 40 members made up of various races. According to team leader A. James Vijeypala, the troupe also has two women - a Malay and an Indian.

The 48-year-old Vijeypala, who has been a lion dance performer for 32 years, said the group has performed all over the country since its formation in Kuala Lumpur in 1985. They have even danced in Bahrain.

Vijeypala said the troupe, which started with only 15 members, had captured the attention of many people with its multi-racial mix. The youngest member is 15 years old and the oldest 59.

Of course, this press release is suspiciously short for a human interest piece, and I don't think multi-racial lion dance troupes are actually all that rare in Malaysia, but never you mind. The gist is there.