52 year old virgin

I probably shouldn't laugh at his misfortune, but from NST: First time 'sex' on video makes FELDA settlers see red:

GEMAS: A Felda settler who made recordings of his sexual acts with a woman for his "own viewing pleasure" is in big trouble after the clips were widely circulated and ended up in the hands of the police.

The 52-year-old settler and his "partner", a 21-year-old woman, were arrested by police and are expected to be charged in the Sessions Court and Syariah Court soon.

The man had sought the help of a 21-year-old friend to record the sexual acts in a hut in a rubber plantation at Felda Jelai 3 early last month. The friend used his mobile phone to record the deed.

The recordings, under the title "Budak Jolai" (Budak Jelai), were circulated via Bluebooth and multimedia messaging service (MMS) to almost every settler in Felda Jelai 3 who had a mobile phone.

There were three recordings showing the man having sexual intercourse with the woman, believed to be from Felda Jelai 4. The man had allegedly paid the woman RM20 to buy a prepaid reload card for her mobile phone as "payment" for her role in the 10-minute recording.

But that's not the best part. The best part is this:

Sources also said that upon questioning, the 52-year-old told police that it was the first time he had sexual intercourse with a woman.

Ha. The poor guy. He just wanted his first time to be memorable.